The Burden of Always Being “On”
Do you feel like you have to be “on” all the time?
I’m guilty of nagging at my husband about not doing enough… especially being active. Ahem.
I’m something of a workaholic and presently Egan’s primary job is caregiver for his parents. Enter the spouse trap of constantly “encouraging” him to do even more. 😕 As a coach, I can see how that leaves him feeling pressured instead. I can recognize it comes from wanting us to be our “best selves” all the time, and wanting him to succeed with everything he loves. Intention or not, there’s a huge impact.
We’re constantly filled with messages that we have to “maximize” everything. It’s mentally and physically exhausting!
Out of 168 hours per week, the average over-worked Bay Area professional finds themselves with around 50-60 hours to handle anything that isn’t sleeping, commuting, and working. If 30 of those “free” hours come from conscious weekend time, that leaves the paltry remaining hours to be distributed through the week.
In that 20-30 “free” hours per week did you remember to eat at least three times a day? Oh yeah, and drink enough water? How about exercise? Chores? Grooming?
The older we get, the more we’re conditioned to do and remember more… simultaneously. Frustration levels can build, especially when we expect ourselves to be both on and perfect. We’re conditioned to multi-task at work, and somehow bring that “efficiency” to our personal lives as well. It’s no wonder that we experience mental as well as physical fatigue at the end of the week, even when we are trying to do all the right things.
Before you become burned out by perfection paralysis or overwhelmed exhaustion, here’s a couple of things to remember.
- Our bodies didn’t get installed with instruction manuals. Flawed programming! That means we have to create our manuals from wherever we are. It’s pretty silly to expect to do something perfectly the first time if you’ve never done it before. That brings me to point two.
- Perfect is a moving bar. There are constantly new ways to challenge ourselves mentally and physically. Learning the process gives longer-lasting success and prevents injury, so don’t beat yourself up if you’re not your ideal self after only a week or even a month of trying something.
For now, I’m going to let go of my perfection paralysis and get this email sent. Instead of doing, it’s time to let go and focus on being with my family. 😄
Do you find yourself caught more by never getting started because you want everything to be perfect, or being impatient because you want to see things RIGHT NOW? Let me know!